The Tale of a Lost Kiss
by Night-Being
Summary: ItaDei Week. After being pulled into a time warp, Deidara finds himself in an unknown place. But instead of figuring out where he is and how he got there, Deidara is captured by guards and brought before the feudal lord of the land. To save his life he must undergo a trial. However, he would soon learn how cunning an Uchiha really is. Warnings: Lemon, language, yaoi! [ItaDei]
1. The Night of a Lost Wanderer

_**Warnings: Language, yaoi, sex in later chapter!**_

 _ **Written in honor of ItaDei Week 2015!**_

 _ _A/N: To make it short. I have chosen to ignore the fact that homosexual relationship would ever be (or ever was) something outraging,_ _inappropriate or forbidden. No more explanations. If you want to know my reasons (or have other questions), send me a PM. :)__

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 _Chapter 1/5_  
The Night of a Lost Wanderer

 **...**

A dark road was drowned in an unstoppable cascades of freezing water. Deep blue sky was covered with thick veil of rain clouds. Somewhere behind that unwelcoming shroud stars were silently flickering and hiding from the rest of the world. Steady beat echoed in Deidara's car as he dashed through the heavy streams falling from heavens. The rush of rain reached even over the buzzing sounds from his old radio. The signal was truly miserable here, but that was to be expected. Deidara didn't meet another car for quite a long time now.

Two hours ago he wondered if he wasn't by any chance lost. That was when the storm had started and the noises from his rusty radio became more annoying than amusing. One hour ago he admitted that he might have taken a wrong turn on his journey. Anyone can make a mistake like that, right? It shouldn't be hard to find the way to the main route again. The map he had unrolled on the seat next to him wasn't really helpful though. He would swear on his own life that no road could be this long and abandoned at the same time. There should be a town, or at least a small village soon. Gas station? A sign?

Deidara grunted in displeasure and turned off the bothersome electronic hum. There wasn't even a trace of a song or so much as human word anyway. He glanced at the map beside him. The road he was on should be turning left soon. A town was supposed to be located after the next several miles, hidden somewhere in the middle of the dense forest that was all around the area. Following after the town there should be another road, which would lead him back on the highway. From there it couldn't be too difficult to find his way out of this mess and arrive to the initially intended destination.

However, the road continued on for another half an hour, and it was as straight as a trail of an arrow launched during a still summer night. No turn nor city came into his rain obscured view. Deidara cursed and shot the useless piece of paper an irritated look. He placed a finger on the map, tracking down the road he should be on with the tip. Light blue eyes kept snapping from the gloomy windshield to the lines on the sheet. It felt as if he was on a completely different road for the past three hours.

There was still the idea of turning the car around and going back, but Deidara refused to believe that he would be unable to figure out some other plan; turning around was too close to giving up. Going back was simply unacceptable! There had to be something he could do! He didn't travel all this time to go back from where he set out. That would be a failure! Deidara hated failure and he had vowed that nothing even remotely similar would meet him in his life again. He had enough of loss and he was not going to regret the decision to start his life over somewhere new. Somewhere far. Somewhere where none of his past mistakes could reach him.

So far it looked like he was going to live his new life in hell. Because that was exactly how it seemed to him now. As if to add salt to Deidara's wounds, his stomach growled hungrily at him. Damn it. Someone… Somewhere must have hated him very much!

Lost on an unknown road, in an unknown place with a bunch of labeled boxes in the back of his car and not a single one of them contained any food. What had he been thinking? Not taking any food with him? Did he have a death wish? Well one could never predict he would get utterly cut off of civilization for several hours. Maybe days? At least he had the map and, of course, his phone… so he had that going for him.

Deidara blinked towards his cellphone. It was lying right on the map, preventing it from rolling back into its original position. That was currently the only thing his treacherous device was good for. Stupid battery always had to die in the worst possible situation. He wasn't much of a cellphone person and people hardly ever reached him, but he wouldn't mind having the option of calling an information center now.

Lightning flashed and for split of a second lit up the dark sky, showing Deidara the never ending straightness of the road he was on and the drenched tall trees of the forest around it. He cursed inwardly, frowning into the night and focusing on the single stripe of light coming from the front lights of his car. He knew these kinds of situations very well. It was the lowest point of one's life. The moment when what could go wrong would go wrong. Deidara feared what possibly could be worse than this.

The response came in a form of a twitch. Twitch of his car to be precise. After one came the second and soon Deidara's eyes were growing wide in horror while his car was gradually slowing down with jerky hiccup. Until it stopped completely.

"Well… Fuck…" this curse found its way out of Deidara's mouth. He turned the key and carefully pushed the pedal, coaxing the engine to start again, but the old wreck simply refused to cooperate. With an irritated groan and a roll of his eyes Deidara's head fell forward in resignation. Then immediately snapped up when the horn of the car mercilessly pierced the night. Deidara jumped in his seat and straightened, angrily measuring the steering-wheel. It looked back at him with almost innocent expression.

"Fuck you!" he exclaimed and granted the mocking steering-wheel several hits with his clenched fists. Every time earning himself high and loud noise. At least the honk seemed to be working well.

Deidara reluctantly glanced out of the window, observing the fierce rain. He really didn't want to get out there. He was almost certain that he wouldn't be able to fix the car himself anyway. He had no idea if he even had anything to fix it with in the first place. Maybe a duct tape? Would that work? He had no clue.

On the other hand if he wouldn't at least take a look, he would never know if the problem wasn't by any chance something minor. Something he could repair easily. He had succeeded in mending his car few times. Most of them were some kinds of magic tricks and Deidara didn't really know how he had done it, but the car worked. So perhaps he would be lucky even this time.

Only if the irritating rain would stop.

Deidara sighed in annoyance and with tips of his fingers began to rhythmically tap over the steering-wheel. Storm continued to rage, not really looking as if it was going to stop any time soon. He didn't have a choice. If he wanted to move from the spot he had to do something.

In one swift motion Deidara reached for the handle, opened the car door and slipped out. He was soaked in an instant; clothes sticking to his body like a second skin. It was damn cold and when he lifted the car hood and exposed the complex mechanism inside, he was already freezing.

A ruthless blow of wind bowed the trees and Deidara trembled and hugged his arms to warm himself. His eyes frantically searched for something which might look amiss with the engine. But it was the middle of the night, it was dark and wintry. He couldn't see a shit and he was probably catching a cold right now. What was he thinking?

Right in the moment Deidara gave up the already lost fight and reached to close the car hood to prevent more water from pouring in, a lightning flashed and lit up the entire sky above his head. For one millisecond the area around was enlightened by a bright blue gleam and in the other it was gone again. But when the air blew anew and carried the sound of the thunder, Deidara's spot in front of the car was already empty. Only a black smear and a sizzle of burned asphalt and metal lingered as a reminder that a person was standing there not a blink of an eye ago.

 **...**

Deidara fell on his hands and knees, powerful siren deafening him as it rang in his ears; reaching even over the still continuing rain. He felt something slimy on his palms, but he feared to open his eyes for the agony in his ears kept stabbing his brain. Holding at least one sense shut seemed like a better option now. He began to blindly pet around, beat of raindrops rushing over his back. He couldn't get why his whole world was spinning or why he had his hands buried in something that felt and smelled like mud.

Sharp pressure of suppressed cough numbed his lungs and when Deidara finally gasped for some air, it mercilessly burned his throat and painfully forced the cough out. The reeling in his head didn't seem to stop and he had to clench his fists and tense his whole body to finally calm down a bit. Deidara cautiously squinted at the drenched ground under him, wet strands of his hair mostly covering his view. His hearing was still a bit muffled by the intense pain, but the throbbing was now slowly ebbing away.

Deidara's wondering why and how he got there – or where the ' _there'_ actually was – got interrupted by rushed smacks of several pairs of feet approaching him. Voices echoed somewhere in distance, as if an invisible veil was created by the rain. He faintly perceived that the people were speaking some foreign language, but he had troubles recognizing what kind of language it was, his mind yet too confused to focus on anything besides breathing.

Raising his head Deidara blinked around, his disoriented eyes trying to catch the unknown environment. Shady silhouettes moved hastily towards him, clanking of metal resounded in the background. And before he could utter a word, rough hands were pulling him up to stand on his wobbly legs. He made a weak attempt to speak, but his voice only scraped through his itching throat and caused another wave of sharp cough. Too tired to give any resistance Deidara let the people drag him somewhere unknown.

He caught a glimpse of what looked like a garden and a wall made of grey stone of irregular shape, but most of his view was obscured by the never ending cascades of water. The surrounding colors were only a dull combination of grey, blue and green. Forlorn feeling settled in Deidara's belly and for a brief moment he wondered if the people clutching his arms were going to help him or harm him.

As Deidara noticed the muddy ground under his feet changing into a timber floor a shimmer of hope tickled his heart. Warmth of a building shielded his body from the merciless rain and he welcomed the almost forgotten sensation with a content sigh. The men stopped and with them ended Deidara's short journey. He was hauled to the floor and landed on his knees again. The pleasant experience of a friendly hall he found himself in evaporated and as Deidara's stiff flesh was slowly heating up, a familiar feeling of anger began to settle in.

He would almost forget how irritated he had been only few minutes ago. Standing in front of his broken car in the middle of nowhere. How he managed to get here stayed unknown to him, but it seemed he had a bigger trouble than that.

 _'We've caught a trespasser, sir.'_

The foreign language he heard before was starting to gain shape. The rhythm and speech pattern seemed a little off, but Deidara was sure that what he had just heard was definitely Japanese. Luckily for him, he could understand and speak the language quite enough. Deidara let the thought about how he got from abandoned road in Canada to what seemed like the middle of Japan slip by. Hopefully he would get some time to ponder about that. Now he seemed to have a whole different problem.

"You have been caught trespassing to a restricted area, what do you have to say for yourself?"

Only upon hearing the deep nasal tone Deidara looked up. There; three men were sitting on three carved wooden chairs placed upon a low pedestal, all dressed in dark blue kimonos made from some luxurious silky material. The oldest one was also the one in the middle. He gazed down on the young blond man of muddy appearance with some sort of disgust in his dark grey eyes, as if seeing someone so different from his own people outraged him immensely. On his left and right two sons seemed to be sitting. Although they might not have been significantly similar to their elder, who was a man with rough lines and callous look, they were almost like a copies of each other. Black smooth hair and rich onyx eyes resonated with soft fairness of their skin. Features of their appearance were still sharp, yet held a significant delicacy that could have been inherited only from a woman. If it weren't for the small differences in their looks and the very visible contrast in their posture, Deidara would believe they might have been twins.

One of them seemed to be younger than the other though. He sat straight in the chair, spine narrowed in an exemplary manner and hands neatly folded in his lap. Dark eyes gazed at Deidara warily and immature arrogance with pride shined from his boyish face. Deidara almost felt like scowling at the irritating mask of emptiness he forced upon himself. As if the porcelain face was carved of cold marble. Deidara didn't buy it, he could see that behind the fake indifference was a tincture of wonder and amusement. Little brat, he would show him if a bunch of guards wasn't standing behind his back.

Deidara pushed down a snort and snapped to see the other one. Twinkle of rage threatened to breach through his lips in a form of a curse. The older son was seated laxly in his chair, leaning to the side and staring somewhere behind Deidara's shoulder. He didn't even make an attempt to acknowledge Deidara's presence. The blank expression on this one wasn't false, he truly didn't care what was happening around him. Like a ghost observing his own funeral.

Deidara blinked and opened his mouth. However he soon found out that besides certain English swear words he had no idea what to say. The three men waited, not moving an inch or lifting a finger, but the impatience almost dripped from their weighty gazes. Whether they were looking at him or somewhere else, neither of them wanted to be held for too long. He was running out of time.

Deidara had no idea if it took him one hour or one second to come up with at least something to respond with, but he eventually found his absent voice. "I got lost," he blurted out. Partly it was true. He really wasn't going to explain that he probably got hit by lightning while trying to fix his car, he couldn't believe it himself yet. This would have to be enough... And besides, his knowledge of Japanese was still rather limited.

"You are a felon and a deceiver!" the oldest man exclaimed and Deidara twitched when the power of his imposing voice fanned over him. Something told him that he might just got himself into even more of a thorny situation. He breathed in for more to say but got interrupted as the man stood up from his seat and spoke again. "Imprison this offender. We shall execute him tomorrow at dawn."

 _Execute?!_ "Wait, no!" Deidara jumped up, his arms being immediately snatched by the guards. "That's not fair!" he shouted and anxiously watched as the three man halted in their tracks.

"I am the lord of this land and I decide what is fair and what is not," the oldest one announced firmly and frowned, intending to leave again.

"I didn't do anything… _Damn it!_ " Deidara called out and jerked with his held hands. His whole body protested angrily at the abrupt motions, but he ignored the pain and stubbornly forced his way forward. "Don't I have some rights? I want a fair trial! Or do you really don't give a shit that you're killing an innocent person?!" he kept on mouthing, the structure of his sentences being probably slightly off. Not like he cared much. His feet dug into the ground as he wedged his way towards the low pedestal.

This time only one of the sons stopped and turned around to look at him. The blankness in his face didn't change, but when he locked his indifferent eyes with Deidara's wrathful ones, Deidara could swear that there was a twinkle of sorrow and regret hidden behind that empty expression. Deidara was too angry to care though. He was the one who was being sentenced to death. He didn't want anyone's pity. He wanted to live!

Seeing his oldest son stop the so called lord paused as well. Then a new voice spoke up and Deidara immediately linked it to the younger of the two brothers. "Allow the man to fend for himself, father. Present him the trial we have in our land."

There was a moment of silence when all three men shared several various glances. The older of two sons seemed concerned somewhat, whereas the younger one's face gained new smug aspect. Deidara grew wary, he didn't like where the situation was going. But if he truly wished to live, he didn't have much of a choice.

"I'll do it! Whatever it is…" Deidara uttered nervously. It could have been a death match for all he knew.

"So be it," the lord declared.

As much as Deidara wished to calm down now, he began to wonder if he wouldn't regret this decision in the near future.

"If you truly wish to receive one chance to redemption, I shall grant you the opportunity," the lord began and gestured towards his oldest son. "This is my heir, Itachi, one day he will become a ruler of this land and preserve my legacy. However, only recently he has been struck with a mental illness which took away his voice. If you succeed in curing his disease, your life shall be spared."

Deidara's mouth fell agape. How was he supposed to do that? He briefly glanced at Itachi who was standing in his spot, still as a mist above a morning forest. From his face settled in the mildest frown it was clear he was as happy with the outcome as Deidara. At this point Deidara would rather take the death match than this. What if this man lost his voice completely? Or what if he was just a stubborn brat who was being a diva? Deidara didn't know this man and he also didn't know how to make him talk.

"Alright," he hummed huskily and cleared his throat. It was still worth a shot. What could be so hard on making a person utter a word?

Deidara noticed his arms had been released and he was now free to move. He made few unsure steps towards the pedestal, expecting the guards to take a hold of him again. Nothing like that happened though and Deidara figured he was free to move towards this Itachi guy. Itachi only stared at him, seemingly expecting anything to happen. Deidara grew suspicious that many people must have tried this before. And all of them probably failed for Itachi was obviously still very much mute. But also very much handsome. Deidara didn't mind coming just one step extra to be closer to him. He didn't give a shit about how dirty or muddy his clothes was in comparison with Itachi's fresh and clean attire. He needed to come up with something right now. He had no idea how much time he had to prove that he can cure this man. Not like he could, but he had to come up with something.

It was unfair! Being forced to undergo trials such as these to save your life. But if Deidara wanted to have the luxury of losing time over thinking of the injustice of his destiny, he would have to succeed right now. He needed something quick and effective. Something shocking!

Standing a step away from the man named Itachi, Deidara narrowed his eyes at the indifferent face. There, in his deep onyx orbs he saw a blink of expectation, but as Deidara kept on stalling in his spot, seemingly doing nothing, it gradually disappeared and was replaced by mere sadness. Itachi obviously didn't care that at this point he was the only hope for Deidara to live. He might have pitied him, but he wouldn't utter a syllable to help him. Deidara wished for nothing else but to punch that guy! Hitting an heir of the lord wasn't probably the best idea though. It might make him talk, but his very first words could as well be an order to kill Deidara nonetheless.

Deidara plotted… talking to a person who didn't want to or couldn't talk seemed pointless. Harming a person who was a son of a wealthy man seemed dangerous. He would swear that somewhere in the background a chuckle was muffled by a pale hand. The younger brother probably having a good time watching Deidara struggle. Once Deidara would make this man talk, he would make sure to shut up the other one.

A sudden idea struck him! It was crazy and completely unexpected even to Deidara himself! Probably as risky as attacking… But it was worth the try. It was exactly what Deidara needed.

Deidara's hands fired up, his fingers grabbed the silky cloth of Itachi's kimono and brought his torso forward. For split of a second Deidara saw a flash of horror and surprise in Itachi's eyes and in the next moment their lips were connected in a clumsy kiss.

The room came to life. The silence that had reign there changed into a commotion as if by a click of a switch. One heartbeat… Two heartbeats… Somewhere in the back of his mind Deidara wondered why their mouths are still connected, why no-one is pushing him away. Then rough hands snatched Deidara by his shoulders and he felt his body being dragged away from Itachi. Blinking furiously Deidara opened his eyes and tried to focus on the mute man and his reactions.

Itachi's lips parted in astonishment and Deidara's expecting face immediately turned into a cocky grin. He was going to talk!

And then came the breathless whisper. "How dare you?"

Deidara pointed an accusing finger at Itachi. "Ha! I knew you can talk, you jerk!" he exclaimed in English and earned himself a hit against the back of his head. Everything went dark…

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 _Make me happy and review? :)_


	2. The Dawn of a New Trial

_**Warnings: Language, yaoi, sex in later chapter!**_

 _ **Written in honor of ItaDei Week 2015!**_

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 _Chapter 2/5_  
The Dawn of a New Trial

 **...**

"You have finally spoken to me after such a long time and _this_ is what you ask from me?" Fugaku, the feudal lord of a small part of Japan, questioned and glared heavily at his oldest son.

"Yes," Itachi nodded, kneeling meekly in front of his father. His face hidden behind two bangs of raven hair.

Fugaku grunted, clearly displeased with the entire ordeal. "Your fascination by that man isn't meaningless and I can see why you may have faith in him, but what you're asking still dissatisfies me greatly," he said and with uneasy sigh stood up from a sitting pillow he had been positioned on.

Itachi bowed his head even further. "Father, please," he pleaded gently but with undying resolution.

Another broody look which Itachi couldn't see but still could feel pushing down on his back was sent in his direction. Fugaku wasn't a man who would be weak when it came to requests, not even from his own sons. He was tenacious and it took long hours to persuade him to do something he wasn't very fond of. Luckily for Itachi he did have a soft spot as it was easier to coax him at times when a joyful event happened to occur. His heir starting to speak again was one of those events.

Fugaku eased his tensed stance and for a brief moment the look in his eyes softened. "Have it your way," he uttered firmly. "But remember that he is now your responsibility and shall he fail, he will be executed nonetheless," Fugaku declared and was about to abandon the room when a question appeared on his tongue. "Do you truly believe that the man is able to cure you entirely?" he asked and stopped to turn around to see his still kneeling son.

There was a small - for some almost insignificant - pause before Itachi answered with silent. "Yes, I do."

No-one would know, not even Fugaku his father, what was really going through the young man's head. The thoughts stayed concealed in that little moment of silence, hidden deep behind Itachi's ever blank face. One thing was clear though. He might have just sealed Deidara's fate forever. And _that_ Itachi knew.

 **...**

Unpleasant yet familiar throbbing in the back of his head brought Deidara to consciousness. He felt as if awakening after a long night at a noisy club. His ears were buzzing, he felt dirty and his entire body was aching. Not to mention he was lying spread wide on a cold, unwelcoming ground and the sickening thirst ravaging his mouth was making his tongue sticky and insides nauseous. What a party that could have been, if only it was one.

Right after squinting his eyes at the stone ceiling, Deidara got a merciless reminder that all that happened to him in the last several hours definitely wasn't a dream. It was a nightmare! Nightmare which was painfully real. The only thing keeping Deidara sane was the belief that he wouldn't die or be killed anytime soon. It was more like an everlasting flicker of hope, because he had no insurance that he wouldn't be snatched the next minute and executed without any proper explanation. However, something in the back of his mind refused to admit such fate. Just as before he refused to believe in defeat! He managed to keep himself alive for this long. He wouldn't give up now!

His stomach growled loudly and reminded Deidara that no matter how much he would want to live, he wasn't going to survive without food or water for long. He wanted to speak up and call for someone's help. Or at least to gain the information on where he was and what was going to be done to him. But he feared to open his mouth for he worried that the disgusting feeling inside his orifice might even heighten.

His surroundings were gloomy and Deidara also noticed that wherever he was it smelled of wet stone and iron. So they had imprisoned him after all. Tough luck. He should have known that kissing the arrogant jerk wasn't a good option. He could bet that the oldest son – whatever his name was – was the one who ordered to lock up Deidara. He didn't have to open his eyes and look around very thoroughly to realize that. He highly doubted that these were chambers for honorable guests... who sexually assaulted the heir, but that was beside the point. And he did make him talk!

The air was stiff and quiet, only here and there a small drop of water fell from a tree or a roof. The rain was over, leaving the vegetation lush and fresh. Under normal circumstances Deidara would enjoy the cool breeze coming through the tiny window right under the ceiling, but now it only brought him an irrepressible tremble. He was cold and he was going be ill for sure.

Damn… _everyone_!

A rustle of cloth caught his attention and Deidara raised his head with a hurt groan, his sight was spinning for a while before it focused on the figure standing right behind the bars. Tall and static. Deidara frowned at the man partly hidden in shadow and noticed his consciousness softly whispering 'Go fuck yourself.' Unfortunately for him it would have very low effect since he somehow knew that he was still very much lost in the weird place where everyone spoke Japanese and acted like they lived in medieval times.

The tall figure looked to the side and nodded. Steps were heard and what seemed like a guard clattering with keys came into Deidara's view. He stuck one into the lock and turned. The door squeaked loudly when it was opened, then silence again.

Deidara's eyebrows curved up. Was he being released? Was he free? Or was it a trick?

He hesitantly got into a seated position and massaging the back of his head he blinked at the guard, then at the other man. He seemed familiar, or maybe it was the absence of spoken word that seemed familiar to Deidara. It must have been the mute guy.

A voice caught Deidara's attention. " _What are you looking at? Get out of there!_ " the guard barked and it took quite a while for Deidara to realize that he was once again listening to Japanese.

Deidara's head hurt too much to form a proper sentence and so he barked at least something back. "Why?" his throat pinched at the sudden strain.

The guard snorted and promptly reached for a dangerous looking stick stuck behind his belt, the motion making Deidara twitch badly, his insides instantly beginning to hurt before the wave of dread gradually floated away as no hit was delivered. Only after additional blink Deidara noticed a hand of the heir straightened in front of the guard, forbidding him from continuing any motion. What was the guy's name again? Deidara was sure he heard it before, but couldn't remember it no matter how much he tried.

The heir nodded at the guard and he immediately stepped away, making it seem as if the lord's son had some magical telepathic powers. Very quietly and gracefully he marched inside the cell. He appeared more like floating through the air than actually walking. It wasn't normal for a person to move so fluently all the time. There was this weird elegance and peacefulness in his motions that made Deidara _very_ suspicious. Everything about the guy was suspicious. Even his annoying calmness. Deidara measured him warily and observed as the heir stretched a hand towards him, offering help to stand up.

"My name is Itachi," he introduced himself, the tone of his voice steady and soothing, perfectly matching the manner in which he was moving.

Deidara narrowed his eyes, glaring not very nicely at the man whom he had so foolishly kissed before. "Deidara," he responded caustically.

"I'm pleased to know your name," Itachi said and bowed ever so slightly, which earned him one of many iffy looks from the blond prisoner.

They both remained still. Deidara glaring up in distrust and Itachi gazing down with serenity. The hand hovered in the air, waiting for Deidara to grab it and be hoisted up. But the stubborn man wasn't going to do it. Instead he got himself up, heavily collecting his body to a standing position. "What do you want from me?" he snarled. No matter how hungry, thirsty or tired he would be. Deidara would never foolishly believe an unknown person. Regardless of how gently they would behave.

"This is not the place nor time for talk. Please, trust me," Itachi spoke quietly and even though his tone lacked emotion there was still the vibe of haste concealed somewhere deep.

As far as Deidara was concerned, he was presented with two options. Stay in prison and die of exhaustion, hunger and thirst or put faith into this man who seemed to be _oh_ _so_ generously saving his ass. Either of them could end badly, and he didn't really plan to trust this Itachi guy any time soon, but getting himself out of the cell seemed like a good idea. Maybe he could make a run for it later.

"I'm not kissing you again, just so we're clear," Deidara spat, but from his eased stance was visible that he reluctantly agreed to whatever the heir might have in mind for him.

There was a brief moment of odd silence, Itachi being either shocked or amused by Deidara's comment. In the end he uttered simple 'follow me,' clearly glad that he wouldn't have to speak more. And Deidara followed, doubtfully trailing behind Itachi who marched forward with firm steps. Deidara was still shaking and his head was throbbing, but at least he was moving somewhere. To remain stuck in the prison would eventually drive him mad.

The echo of their feet resounded through the hall. It was narrow space for only one person and it seemed that there was a single lonely stone cell at the very end of it. Deidara couldn't understand how the structure of the building worked, for now it seemed like a tunnel through some kind of a mountain. When they finally got out, Deidara briefly glanced back and learned that his theory was indeed true. The small hole at the base of the rocky hill was almost invisible in the gloomy dusk. There was one entrance and right when they left and got to a path made of slippery stones, two guards closed the iron door that had been held open for the heir to walk through.

Itachi didn't slow down nor he turned back to check whether Deidara was strolling behind him or not. He simply continued to make his way through what seemed like thick yet trim garden. Deidara didn't even notice when the vegetation disappeared and their feet touched a wooden floor. A rather wide porch with wall on one side and beautiful carved railing on the other guided their way now. It was lit by a simple paper lanterns hanged from the roof and candles placed in bowls by the wall, presenting a lovely yet haunted atmosphere. Deidara kept looking around, searching for some other living soul, but the mansion of the feudal lord seemed as empty as it was huge.

They arrived at the end where the house made a turn and continued in right angle to the left. The porch finished here though and so Itachi slid the last door on his right and then took off his shoes. Deidara instinctively copied him and also left his dirty boots forgotten outside. He stepped inside and was met with a square hole full of steaming water embedded in the floor and smell of food placed on a small low table right next to the typical Japanese bath. His chin fell down.

"Holy shit," he breathed out in English, which made his – apparently now host – turn around and grant him an empty glance. Deidara couldn't read what was hidden inside those peacefully staring eyes, but at this point he didn't give a crap.

Itachi watched him for a moment and then pulled out a scroll that had been hidden somewhere in his clothing. He handed it to Deidara without a word.

Deidara frowned and measured the rolled up paper. He honestly didn't care what was in it. All he wanted was to hop into that steamy heaven and stuff his face with tasty food. "What's that?" he uttered and not so gently snatched it from Itachi's fingers. He didn't wait for permission and unrolled it. With an annoyed sigh Deidara scanned the page and the rather fair amount of Japanese signs. This would take him hours to translate!

Damn…

"Do you have an English version somewhere there too? Or at least a dictionary?" Deidara nodded towards Itachi's attire, partly expecting him to fish out another scroll. This one hopefully in Deidara's mother tongue. He could _speak_ some Japanese. He had lived there for few years and learning to communicate through spoken word was almost like an obligation, but he had never learned to properly read. All the signs seemed way too complicated for him. Now he wished he had done it though.

Wordlessly observing him Itachi mildly shook his head once, then softly spoke up. "You shall contribute your decision at dawn," was all he said before turning around and leaving Deidara to enjoy the hospitality he had been just granted in peace and privacy.

And Deidara would! Tonight he decided it was better to forget about all the troubles and let his senses be pampered by the luxury that had been provided to him. What was behind all this care would be decoded after a nice bath and a proper meal. The thought that no lord would show him such comfort if he would want to get rid of him was going to get him through the night and hopefully allow him few hours of undisturbed sleep.

 **...**

Shocked yelp sliced the chilly morning air. "What?!"

Door was slid abruptly, making a sharp sound against the frame. For a second blond head peeked out before the man marched out on the porch wholly. Looking from left to right he frantically searched for any living soul, face deformed with rage and sheet of paper crumbled in his fist.

It was just after dawn, the breeze soft and calm. The temperature was a pleasant mean to bring one's brain to life after a good long sleep. Silence was settled around the house, its servants used to work quietly like mice. Their hasty and deft steps could be heard as a mere rustles when one would hold his breath and listen closely.

Deidara didn't have time to eavesdrop on servants though. He had much bigger problem. His steps echoed heavily through the house, making the whisper of workers still completely and nervous silence rise within the walls. "Where is he?! Where is that damn jerk?!" Deidara roared as he thudded his way along the wall with many slid doors. " _Itachi_!"

Another door was opened merely few stops in front of the angry man and Deidara stormed into the available room, clutching the person in the door by the neckline of his kimono. " _You_!" he growled glaring at the man without actually registering whom he was attacking.

Itachi blinked in surprise and staggered two steps behind, moving back so Deidara wouldn't barrel right into him with full strength.

"What is this shit?!" Deidara yelled and stuffed the damaged scroll under Itachi's nose. "Is it some kind of a sick joke? ' _The offender have gained the privilege to live but he has yet to merit his freedom_.'?" he quoted the text and shook with the paper in front of Itachi's eyes. "Are you people nuts?! I didn't do anything! I already am _free_ person! I have rights! You can't take away my rights! I want to talk to my lawyer!" he ranted, holding a staring contest with the lord's oldest son who observed Deidara's enrage ever so calmly.

Itachi mildly quirked an eyebrow, but other than that stayed mute and thoroughly confused by Deidara's choice of words.

Which irked Deidara immensely. "Don't look at me as if I'm the crazy one here! I'm nobody's slave! I'm nobody's fool! Is this a joke?! Because it's not fucking funny! Is it some kind of twisted reality show? Hm? Is there a camera hidden somewhere?! A set up?! People laughing at me?! I'm warning you I-"

Lips landed on Deidara's, cutting off his sentence in the middle. The blond's lids grew wide, his heart missing a beat and stomach spinning like a Ferris wheel. So soft… He felt a hand gently holding the back of his head, making sure he wouldn't move away. But before he could count one and one together and actually make an attempt to push the heir away, Itachi parted, going one step back for safety.

Deidara's hand with the crumpled scroll descended down. "Why did you…?" he breathed out, too shocked to muster more words. It wasn't just about the kiss, it was about the tingling that stayed behind. And also about the unquestionable fact that Itachi was one hell of a handsome man, which Deidara might have noticed before, but didn't really ponder about since he had other things to worry about.

Strolling his eyes thoughtfully over Deidara's tensed form Itachi smoothly spoke up. "You compelled me to talk though a kiss. I fathomed it may work the opposite way as well."

Deidara blinked mutely and parted his lips only to close them a second after.

"I see… It does," Itachi whispered.

There was a flicker of something Deidara could only call an amused smirk before Itachi turned around and slid the door in order to close them again. Deidara felt the rage growing inside him once more and he almost started screaming again, but then he caught a change in the stance of the heir. His shoulders inched down as if in surrender and sadness. Facing the wall Itachi hesitated with his hand placed on the door handle and Deidara could hear a sorrow sigh before Itachi turned back to look at him. "Have you studied the entire contract?" he asked quietly.

Deidara glanced at the sheet, then back at Itachi who was awaiting the answer with strange tincture of grief in his onyx orbs. "N-no? Only the bits I could understand," he explained hesitantly. Something told him that he should have read the stupid contract more thoroughly, because there was obviously something he had missed. "Why? Who wrote it?" he questioned.

"It was written by me. I persuaded father to allow me to bestow you this contract. I'm truly sorry if it offends you in any way, but it was the only mean to release you from the prison. Father is a cunning man. He never intended to present you with the freedom that you deserve. By forcing me to speak you have indeed gained the right to live, but you have never requested the permission to leave.

Father would let you rot in the cell; torture you with lack of nourishment and drive you mad with almost no supply of water. Eventually you would die of exhaustion or commit suicide. Father's consciousness would stay untouched, because he had given you the opportunity to redeem yourself.

I have been inquiring father for many hours before he finally permitted me to give you the contract. It is another trial and it may not give you the freedom you desire, but it has gotten you out of the prison and made you our honourable guest. For one whole month you will live here like a noble man, shall you meet the requirements in that given time, you will be free," Itachi ended the exhaustive speech and looked worriedly at Deidara who was standing there tensely the whole time. It was a miracle that he didn't interrupt the heir, but Itachi's voice was somehow unable to stop. It flowed so softly and yet firmly. It made Deidara want to listen and actually perceive what was being said to him. Also because it concerned his further fate.

But now Itachi has finished talking and it was Deidara's turn for a change. "So what is in the contract? What do I have to do?" There were many queries that ran through his head, countless of unanswered questions. He had no choice but to sort them one by one. To know what he would agree to do – or attempt to do – was one of the first things he wished to know.

Deidara would swear that Itachi had to push away the urge to cringe before he began to explain. "It is quite easy. Be my companion and make me laugh. Should I laugh only once, your contract is fulfilled."

"And that's it?" Deidara questioned in disbelief. As crazy as it sounded, he was oddly relieved. Of course he still couldn't fully trust this guy, but he could reread the contract thoroughly and fully one more time to make sure Itachi wasn't by any chance lying to him. Yet to Deidara's surprise Itachi actually seemed like a trustworthy man, not to mention he was also the one who apparently saved his ass from rotting in that damp cell. Deidara had made him talk rather easily before, he was sure that making him laugh would be just as effortless.

"Yes," Itachi nodded, steadily going back into his silent mode.

Deidara thought for a while, then knelt down on the floor and straightened the sheet there. Skimming through it again. "What would happen if I fail?"

"You will be executed." No sugar coating. Itachi was as emotionless as a cold winter night.

Deidara glared at him, not happy with the outcome. "What if I refuse to sign?"

"The same."

He should have expected as such. Deidara was reckless and rash most of the time. He had been called a daredevil more times than he could count, but when it came to his life he could act responsibly and think about this just a little more.

The fact that he was out of the prison, in clean clothes and after a nice bath and meal which had been followed by a peaceful sleep in modest yet comfortable bedroom was undeniable. Itachi probably wanted to show him that he is safe and sound in the house. A nice gesture, not everyone would take the trouble and prepare everything for Deidara to feel good in the foreign environment. They could have made him sign the contract with force as well, if it was really that necessary. Or threaten him. Or just murder him. Why bother, right? But every generosity comes with a price. This time it was the risk that should Deidara fail, his life would be taken.

Deidara glanced up at the heir who was observing him with empty expression. He wouldn't mind seeing a smile on that pretty face. He grinned widely. "Just tell me one thing and I'll sign. Why me? I didn't _do_ anything that special." Giving it a second thought this might have interested Deidara more than before. When all the other troubles were out of the way.

Itachi watched him mutely for quite a while, Deidara staring right back, awaiting what would be said to him. He honestly didn't expect much. This entire ordeal was one hell of a crazy ride and he didn't hope there might be a logical explanation to any of it. And then a brief reflection of a gentle smile flashed in Itachi's eyes and he spoke up. "It is because you _are_ special."

* * *

 _A/N: Mainly for **Uchan382**... Thank you for the review and for your observation. I could have done research too, but I was simply too lazy, so I've solved it like you've seen at the beginning. Sometimes it's better to be safe than sorry. :)_


End file.
